Like sands through the hourglass, so are the Days of Our Lives...
When I was 11, I had a friend whose mom would videotape (with a VCR!) a soap opera by the name of Days of Our Lives. Sometimes I'd go to her house after school and she'd update me on the storyline and we'd watch the latest episode. Over the next several years I'd watch it when I could and did a pretty good job of staying up to date on who was married to who, who had died, who had mysteriously come back to life, etc. I googled Days of Our lives and found out that the show is still on the air. If I'd consistently watched the show from the time I was introduced to it, I could've already spent over 7000 hours watching it! To me, that would seem like a great waste of my time! (Maybe we'll talk about the distorted reality or poor morality of soap operas in another post.)
Unfortunately, I cannot tell you that I am always a good steward of my time. God has given each of us a set amount of time on this earth. Like sands through the hourglass... The last I heard, we have about 75 years, but we all know that some live longer and others die much earlier. Someday I'll get to stand before God and take a look at my spent life. I wish I'd learned this lesson in middle school because this overflowed life is going by quickly!
Let's fast forward from soap operas to life with a breastfeeding infant and Roller Coaster Tycoon. It's hard to get anything done while breastfeeding an infant. When one of my kids was a newborn we had a computer with Roller Coaster Tycoon. I'd sit down to nurse the baby and several hours later, after successfully building an amusement park, filling it with rides and shops, getting happy customers to spend their money, and reaching my goal, I'd turn the game off and reenter the real world. I took breaks to change diapers or handle urgent needs, but in the end it was still hours wasted. One day, as my house was a mess and the kids were extra needy, it hit me that I was wasting my life cleaning up virtual puke from virtual kids that had gone on too many virtual rides. I had to stop playing Roller Coaster Tycoon! Is there even a support group for people like that? I had to make the choice to spend my time wisely. It wasn't easy but, I was able to quit wasting time on Roller Coaster Tycoon!
Let's skip ahead again to the Facebook age.
"I don't have time for Facebook."
I thought it. I said it. I meant it. So how did I get sucked in again to another time-waster? I won't take more of your time with my journey through Facebook games, but the pattern was the same as Roller Coaster Tycoon. I haven't given up Facebook but I don't play the games anymore. I'm not saying Facebook is evil. It's a great way to stay connected to people, as long as I don't disconnect from the people in my home or get sucked into playing games for hours at a time.
These are just a few of many, many, many things I've wasted time on over the years. Looking back I could add up way more hours wasted than I'd care to admit. Sometimes I can even waste time and justify it because I'm keeping up with current events, or having "me time". With today's technology, we have more information available to us than we can possibly view in our entire lifetime, even if we spent every waking hour online! I should constantly be asking myself, "Should I be spending my time on this?"
There is a line somewhere between "relaxing and refueling" and "wasting time" that I cross too easily. It's so easy to spend hours at a time "surfing the net", playing games, shopping online, watching videos, connecting with friends, etc. I need time to kick back and relax but too much relaxing makes me feel more stressed! So, how can I keep it all in balance? This is my plan:
Prioritize.
God has to come first! This is something that doesn't always look the same for me. Right now, since I have a nursing baby and an internet tablet with YouVersion, I get to have daily Bible reading at some point during the morning while feeding the baby. By July I'll need a new plan to make the time, but putting God first isn't only about daily Bible reading. It's something I need to choose to do all the time. It's choosing not to have our kids lie to the telemarketer on the phone. It's choosing to use gentle words rather than harsh ones. It's giving God credit for His beautiful creation, His provisions, and His blessings in my life. It's being a good steward of the time He's given me.
My spouse has to come next, before the kids. That means I'm willing to put kids to bed early, even though they don't have to catch a bus in the morning. It also means I leave them home with a sitter so that I can spend time with my husband even if they beg to come with. It means I do whatever I can to keep a relationship with my husband strong enough that if given a choice, we'd rather spend time together than with anyone else. It means I can't be a nagging wife!
Next are my children, who will constantly be striving for the top of my list, but will be much better off if I keep them in 3rd place. The best things I can do for them is to model putting God first and love their father. I need to remind myself that I won't always be there for them so I need to be intentional about the legacy that is passed down. I need to teach them to love God and love others (including each other). I need to remember that everyone makes mistakes and I'm not perfect. Parenting is hard sometimes. I need to be the best Mom I can be today, and strive to be a better Mom tomorrow.
God, husband, children. When a new opportunity comes along I need to ask myself, "Can I take this on and keep my priorities in line?" Sometimes we have to say no. We have chosen not to involve our children in everything that comes their way. What good is adding extra activities if it's going to cost my salvation or send someone to an early grave!? Trust me. You don't want to see me completely stressed! I can joke now, but if I can be completely open with you, I have said so many hurtful words to my children that I couldn't even begin to count them all. Last summer, God performed a miracle through a book entitled Unglued by Lysa Terkherst. I am no longer a yelling, screaming mother. I had to learn where my limitations are. I had to choose each day to react better than the day before. I had to change the yelling legacy that's been carried down through generations. I had to stop wasting time on the stuff I don't have time for! I'm not perfect but am making progress, and that's what matters.
When I was 11, I had a friend whose mom would videotape (with a VCR!) a soap opera by the name of Days of Our Lives. Sometimes I'd go to her house after school and she'd update me on the storyline and we'd watch the latest episode. Over the next several years I'd watch it when I could and did a pretty good job of staying up to date on who was married to who, who had died, who had mysteriously come back to life, etc. I googled Days of Our lives and found out that the show is still on the air. If I'd consistently watched the show from the time I was introduced to it, I could've already spent over 7000 hours watching it! To me, that would seem like a great waste of my time! (Maybe we'll talk about the distorted reality or poor morality of soap operas in another post.)
Unfortunately, I cannot tell you that I am always a good steward of my time. God has given each of us a set amount of time on this earth. Like sands through the hourglass... The last I heard, we have about 75 years, but we all know that some live longer and others die much earlier. Someday I'll get to stand before God and take a look at my spent life. I wish I'd learned this lesson in middle school because this overflowed life is going by quickly!
Let's fast forward from soap operas to life with a breastfeeding infant and Roller Coaster Tycoon. It's hard to get anything done while breastfeeding an infant. When one of my kids was a newborn we had a computer with Roller Coaster Tycoon. I'd sit down to nurse the baby and several hours later, after successfully building an amusement park, filling it with rides and shops, getting happy customers to spend their money, and reaching my goal, I'd turn the game off and reenter the real world. I took breaks to change diapers or handle urgent needs, but in the end it was still hours wasted. One day, as my house was a mess and the kids were extra needy, it hit me that I was wasting my life cleaning up virtual puke from virtual kids that had gone on too many virtual rides. I had to stop playing Roller Coaster Tycoon! Is there even a support group for people like that? I had to make the choice to spend my time wisely. It wasn't easy but, I was able to quit wasting time on Roller Coaster Tycoon!
Let's skip ahead again to the Facebook age.
"I don't have time for Facebook."
I thought it. I said it. I meant it. So how did I get sucked in again to another time-waster? I won't take more of your time with my journey through Facebook games, but the pattern was the same as Roller Coaster Tycoon. I haven't given up Facebook but I don't play the games anymore. I'm not saying Facebook is evil. It's a great way to stay connected to people, as long as I don't disconnect from the people in my home or get sucked into playing games for hours at a time.
These are just a few of many, many, many things I've wasted time on over the years. Looking back I could add up way more hours wasted than I'd care to admit. Sometimes I can even waste time and justify it because I'm keeping up with current events, or having "me time". With today's technology, we have more information available to us than we can possibly view in our entire lifetime, even if we spent every waking hour online! I should constantly be asking myself, "Should I be spending my time on this?"
There is a line somewhere between "relaxing and refueling" and "wasting time" that I cross too easily. It's so easy to spend hours at a time "surfing the net", playing games, shopping online, watching videos, connecting with friends, etc. I need time to kick back and relax but too much relaxing makes me feel more stressed! So, how can I keep it all in balance? This is my plan:
Prioritize.
God has to come first! This is something that doesn't always look the same for me. Right now, since I have a nursing baby and an internet tablet with YouVersion, I get to have daily Bible reading at some point during the morning while feeding the baby. By July I'll need a new plan to make the time, but putting God first isn't only about daily Bible reading. It's something I need to choose to do all the time. It's choosing not to have our kids lie to the telemarketer on the phone. It's choosing to use gentle words rather than harsh ones. It's giving God credit for His beautiful creation, His provisions, and His blessings in my life. It's being a good steward of the time He's given me.
My spouse has to come next, before the kids. That means I'm willing to put kids to bed early, even though they don't have to catch a bus in the morning. It also means I leave them home with a sitter so that I can spend time with my husband even if they beg to come with. It means I do whatever I can to keep a relationship with my husband strong enough that if given a choice, we'd rather spend time together than with anyone else. It means I can't be a nagging wife!
Next are my children, who will constantly be striving for the top of my list, but will be much better off if I keep them in 3rd place. The best things I can do for them is to model putting God first and love their father. I need to remind myself that I won't always be there for them so I need to be intentional about the legacy that is passed down. I need to teach them to love God and love others (including each other). I need to remember that everyone makes mistakes and I'm not perfect. Parenting is hard sometimes. I need to be the best Mom I can be today, and strive to be a better Mom tomorrow.
God, husband, children. When a new opportunity comes along I need to ask myself, "Can I take this on and keep my priorities in line?" Sometimes we have to say no. We have chosen not to involve our children in everything that comes their way. What good is adding extra activities if it's going to cost my salvation or send someone to an early grave!? Trust me. You don't want to see me completely stressed! I can joke now, but if I can be completely open with you, I have said so many hurtful words to my children that I couldn't even begin to count them all. Last summer, God performed a miracle through a book entitled Unglued by Lysa Terkherst. I am no longer a yelling, screaming mother. I had to learn where my limitations are. I had to choose each day to react better than the day before. I had to change the yelling legacy that's been carried down through generations. I had to stop wasting time on the stuff I don't have time for! I'm not perfect but am making progress, and that's what matters.